In the midst of a casual lunch conversation, my friend revealed the recent passing of her brother. As we shared updates on our lives since our last meeting, the weight of her loss hung in the air. She knew of my own journey through grief following my son's unexpected transition in May 2017, a journey I had documented in a book. However, unsure if she grasped the depth of my exploration into the enduring connections with our departed loved ones, I gently broached the topic of spiritual presence.
To my comfort and surprise, she readily embraced the idea that our loved ones might linger in spirit. In recounting an experience from the day after her brother's passing, she described a poignant moment. Amidst the raw grief, as she prepared to navigate the somber tasks of arranging her brother's services, a small gust of wind, imbued with the distinct scent of his cologne, greeted her as she stepped outside. A profound sense of his presence enveloped her, unaccompanied by any visible source. In that fleeting encounter, she felt an indescribable peace, a manifestation of her brother's love that momentarily eased her grief and assured her that all was well. It was a poignant message, delivered through the subtle language of the wind, expressing love and solace.
Reflecting on her story brought to mind my own journey since the sudden passing of my son six years ago. In those initial months, grief visited me like an uninvited guest each night, manifesting in tears that flowed freely as I lay down to sleep. The connection we share with those we love deeply transcends the physical realm, and the void left by their absence feels like losing a part of oneself. It's a sentiment echoed by many who navigate the turbulent waters of grief.
What I've come to realize in the years that followed is that this profound connection endures. Through various affirmations, I've felt the continued presence of my son's love, a comforting reassurance that I am not alone in experiencing such connections. The journey through grief is unique for each individual, but the thread that binds us is the depth of love that transcends the boundaries of life and death.
Amidst the ebb and flow of grief, I stumbled upon the solace of self-guided meditations. In those quiet moments, I found a sanctuary in my mind—a serene, sandy beach embraced by clear blue waters and swaying palm trees. For about 10 minutes, I navigated a picturesque pathway, adorned with trees, flowers, hills, and grasses, eventually leading me to the resplendent beach. In this imaginative haven, I conjured details with care—a table and two chairs overlooking the water, a place where I could sit with my son, Eric. Together, we savored lattes, engaged in conversation, and relished the breeze and the ocean's scent. Though a creation of my mind, it afforded me a sense of connection and solace, a precious balm for my grieving heart.
On a particularly weary night, I decided to forgo the usual guided pathway and simply visualize the table overlooking the beach, where I anticipated encountering Eric. As I settled into this meditative state, an unforeseen revelation unfolded within the first 20 seconds. Amidst tears, I heard, distinctly in my right ear, the tender words, "I’m right here, Mom." The weight of those words, unanticipated and surreal, enveloped me in a moment of indescribable peace—an ethereal connection that transcended the limitations of human language. It was a gift, a glimpse into a realm where love persists beyond the veil of life and death.
Attempting to convey this profound experience to skeptics can be a challenge, often met with dismissive phrases like "grief's impact on the mind" or "merely a dream." Yet, there exists no obligation to justify this deeply personal encounter. I know what I felt—a surreal connection, a comforting assurance that Eric's presence endures. Over time, I've encountered numerous accounts echoing similar experiences of connection with departed loved ones. Nature becomes a conduit—birds lingering outside windows, dormant plants blossoming unexpectedly, gentle hugs felt in slumber, texts received from the departed, and even audible or visual manifestations of loved ones.
These shared narratives, diverse yet interconnected, weave a tapestry of reassurance. In embracing the inexplicable, we find comfort in the continuation of love, transcending the boundaries of the tangible world. Each account is a testament to the profound and enduring nature of the connections we forge with those we love.
In the realm of connection with departed loved ones, it transcends external opinions. Today, my conviction stands firm that our bond with those who have passed is eternal. The profoundness of this connection often eludes us in the face of overwhelming grief triggered by the absence of their physical presence. Yet, whether we consciously acknowledge it or not, we remain intrinsically linked to the essence, the soul of our loved ones. This connection, if we choose to embrace it, persists undiminished.
The belief in this enduring connection is at the heart of my journey, articulated in my book "Look Around; A Mother’s Journey from Grief and Despair to Healing and Hope." This narrative unfolds the spiritual odyssey that ensued after the sudden departure of my 24-year-old son, Eric, leading me to a profound comprehension of life's existential questions. Further delving into this exploration, my recent work, "A Bird Called Wisdom," expresses the nuances of grief and the healing journey through poetic means.
For those open to the idea, the connection with a departed loved one never dissipates. It's an enduring thread that weaves through the fabric of our lives. In this unwavering connection lies a wellspring of comfort, a source of healing and hope. The belief in the eternal nature of these bonds is a testament to the resilience of love, transcending the boundaries of life and death.
Dolores Cruz, Author and Spiritual Explorer, invites you to delve into her reflections and insights on her website. In sharing personal stories, we collectively unravel the tapestry of human experience. If you have a compelling narrative to share, consider submitting a pitch to HuffPost and be part of the ongoing dialogue on life, loss, and the transformative power of connection.
In conclusion, the essence of our connection with departed loved ones is a deeply personal and enduring truth, impervious to external perspectives. Regardless of the overwhelming grief triggered by the physical absence, the belief stands strong — our bond transcends the tangible, reaching into the eternal realm of the soul.
This conviction is at the heart of my journey, as shared in "Look Around; A Mother’s Journey from Grief and Despair to Healing and Hope." The exploration of life's profound questions after the sudden loss of my son, Eric, led to a transformative understanding, a journey further articulated in the poetic expressions of "A Bird Called Wisdom."
For those willing to embrace the idea, the connection persists, offering solace, healing, and hope. It is an enduring thread woven into the fabric of our existence, a testament to the resilience of love that extends beyond the boundaries of life and death.
As a spiritual explorer and author, I invite you to delve into these reflections on my website, where the complexities of grief and the transformative power of connection are explored. Each personal story contributes to the collective narrative of human experience, fostering understanding and empathy. If you have a compelling story, consider sharing it with HuffPost, becoming part of a broader conversation about the profound, enduring nature of love and connection.
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